How a Child’s Developmental Age Can Impact the Parenting Plan

As discussed in previous blog postings, a parenting plan is a plan created by former partners who have separated, and the focus of the plan is to determine how the child(ren) will be raised. This includes decision-making responsibility, and parenting time. Decision-making responsibility refers to the parent making fundamental decisions regarding the upbringing and health of a child, and the right to make all final decisions. Parents will also have to determine the parenting time arrangement between the parties which refers to the right to spend time with the child for a certain period.

 The Ontario counterpart of the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts (AFCC-Ontario) created the Parenting Guidelines. These guidelines are meant to help parents and professionals create the best child-focused and realistic parenting plan according to their circumstances. The Guidelines provide guidance on how to improve communication between the parties, and focuses on creating an arrangement that is best for the child. When doing so, they take into consideration the child’s age and their developmental stage. These Guidelines are not binding, but are informative and are based on child development research and how children are impacted by separation and divorce.

As reproduced from the Guide, when parents have separated, research shows some of the following results:

• ·        Children do best in both the short-term and the long-run when they feel loved and cared for by both parents.
• ·        Children generally do better when both parents have stable and meaningful involvement in their children’s lives.
• ·        The strength of a parent’s relationship to a child is affected more by parental commitment, warmth and the ability to meet the child’s needs than it is by the amount of time spent with the child.
• ·        Each parent has different and valuable contributions to make to their children’s development.
• Parenting plans will need to be adjusted over time as the needs and circumstances of parents and children change.

The Guide also speaks to how conflict can impact children and provides a guideline on the advice professionals have, some of which include the following:

• ·        Parents should not make children feel that they have to “choose” between the parents.
• ·        Each parent should strive to have a respectful relationship with the other parent.
• ·        Each parent should support the child’s relationship with the other parent.
• ·        A parent should not make derogatory comments about the other parent in the presence of the child or when a child may overhear them.
• ·        Children should not be expected to communicate messages between parents.
• ·        Parents should exchange the children without arguing and by acknowledging each other in a polite way.
• ·        A parent should allow their children to attend important family celebrations and events with the other parent.
• ·        While parents should acknowledge that there may be differences between their two homes, it is preferable to refer to these as "differences," and not as "better" or "worse".

The underlying theme of the Guidelines focuses on the need for parents to learn how to cooperate for the best interests of the child. They advise on co-parenting and mutual support between the parents and focus on the importance of communication between the parties for the well-being of the child. The Guidelines advises the parties on the developmental stages and needs/capabilities of children across various ages, and how the developmental stages may be taken into consideration when creating a parenting plan.

For instance, the needs and requirements that a child has in their first 3 years are different from the needs and requirements that a child needs at the age of 8. Given their age and development stage, the parenting plan will change as the child’s needs are examined. In a case involving a dispute over parenting time, the Judge used the research conducted from the Guidelines, and ordered that a father’s time with his 4-and-a-half-year-old child increase from 4 to 5 days bi-weekly. The Judge stated that the Parenting Guide provided helpful information to the court and would be helpful as the child develops. The Parenting Guidelines also provide parties with a Parenting Plan Template to help them create a parenting plan. Within the template, there are various provisions that parties can include or choose to exclude, and the guidelines offer different schedules that the parties may wish to incorporate such as “Alternating Weekends and One Overnight Per Week with One Parent, Rest of Time with the Other Parent”, or “Shared Equal Time: Split-Week (2-2-5-5) Rotation”. The Guide also discusses topics such as children’s personal items, virtual parenting time, time with other significant adults, amongst other topics that may be beneficial for parties to consider.

You can find a link to the Parenting Guide here: https://afccontario.ca/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/AFCC-O-Parenting-Plan-Guide-Version-2.0-December-2021-.pdf. You can find the parenting plan template here: https://afccontario.ca/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/AFCC-O-Parenting-Plan-Template-Version-2.0-December-2021.pdf.

To note, the above should not be taken as legal advice, and if you have any questions or concerns about your case please speak to a lawyer. To find out how we can help you with your matter, please visit our website at https://www.grantleelaw.ca/ or call us at 905-315-6837 to book your consultation now.